Oh my, sometimes the subconscious mind can be a peculiar thing. I was a sensitive child - to say the least. I had this unfortunate habit of allowing other people's ideas to override my own.

One day when I was just a little thing in grade two - another youngling in my class so informed me with seeming conviction, "you run funny!"...so I willingly took it upon myself to run as little as possible for say, oh...the next 20 years or so (man oh man!). What was I thinking! This is a clear example of our most unfortunate ability to perceive the surface of life.

Well, then one day in the wake of my spiritual awakening during my daily 'hike' I broke out into a run and found I could do so with ease and grace and for long periods of time. Hmmmm- suddenly that old memory flashed before me with startling clarity. Hey! I won that race, as I had won most races before - that girl was JEALOUS of me! I had built an empire out of a subconscious irrational fear.

And good grief - there has been NO END to the joy running has given me. Running could be personified as my invisible best friend. I take everything out on him - all of my anger, anxieties, darkest hours - hashing out the conflictions in my mind. He tells me my most inspiring thoughts - showers me with light - we are partners for life - and hence freeing me to rarely take out my woes on any of you. Thank those lucky stars.

Lately when I see the way we nurture our fears, out comes my Budda laugh. How absurd our dramas are and how absurd that we hold ourselves back from our true desires and needs because of these tiny subconscious fears that seem so big are merely holding us back from lifes greatest beauty.

If I saw Budda in his enlightenment would I be solemn? No way! I'd laugh with him, hug him, rub his tummy. We'd lie in the sun and I'd let him teach me the wisdom of the flowers and birds. He would muse at my impatience, my great, great impatience. I'd muse at his patience, his great great patience and then we'd laugh out loud. "So what?" I'd say, and we'd laugh again because we'd know how small our woes truly are and should not be taken so very seriously.

When you catch glances of life’s beauty, laugh off those damn fears.

(back to blog)